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Entries in superhero (1)

Wednesday
Jun062012

Vulnerability

Oh, I had a lesson. No, it was practice, in vulnerability the other day. I had sent out my MailChimp link via my personal email to invite people to sign up for my email lists for my practice (turns out I had been spamming all of these years and didn't realize it!). Several hours later I remembered that it is recommended that one send out campaigns to one's self so you can monitor it. I sent out the email to myself and signed up for my list.

I was horrified to find that the last screen offered the option to go back to what one was doing before, or to go to the website of the email list!! As far as I was concerned, my website was off line, private, not accessible and not visible to the public!!!  I had a some stuff on my website that was rather personal, that I was considering having there, but I wasn't sure..... I felt exposed. Really, uncomfortably exposed.

After a freak-out, where I had a friend of mine test the PayPal to make sure it was functioning and I made sure that all of the pages were enabled, I did some editing. But I decided, at least so far, to include the parts that make me feel exposed. I feel in the long run these are the parts that make for good relationships, show the work that I'm doing, and show that I'm real. Yes, one can be a superhero and have fears at the same time. There's evidence that the progressive business sense has enveloped vulnerability. And, really, this is where I want to be--unsure, exploring, feeling a bit exposed, on the edge, a bit uncomfortable. It's where I trust I can connect with others better and it's where I can most be myself.

My practice truly is my best source of practice.